Hello and welcome back to Gorgeous Life Blog! If you are new here, my name is Victoria and I talk about all things related to modern elegance and personal growth. Today I want to talk about why I quit social media.
If you prefer to listen to this blog post, I also have a podcast episode about this topic! Let me keep you company while you drive to work or do chores!
I quit social media
I feel it is necessary to specify that I did not permanently delete all of my social media profiles, I simply removed the apps from my phone, making it more of a challenge to access the apps. I didn’t want to remove my profiles completely, because I do have valuable memories on them and I would like for people to have some place to reach me if they need to.
I’ve wanted to delete my social media for a long time now. Over the past year I have started to have very negative feelings towards the platforms. I’ve noticed there is a toxic pattern of trends and content that everyone becomes consumed with.
It was taking over my life and after all the time I was spending on the platforms I still wasn’t happy or fulfilled at the end of the day. What I didn’t realize is that more and more people are feeling the same way and are quitting the social media-verse as well.
In this post, I am going to list all of the reasons why I am tired of social media and why I decided to delete the apps. I do believe there are some positives to having these platforms. After all, they were created as a way for people to connect with one another. But overall for me I realized it was having a negative impact on my mental health and how I perceived the world.
When social media platforms first came onto the scene, they were pretty simple. They were fun and helpful, but simple nonetheless. Now, we have many different platforms, each with many different types of content. Instagram alone has feed, reels, dms, guides, and stories. Twitter and facebook added stories as well. Tik Tok is super addicting in general because the algorithm really sucks you in and keeps you busy for a long time.
Then for creators, we have to be creating all different types of content for these social platforms to ‘please the algorithm’. Over the past year or so, I’ve noticed that there is a lot of noise. I would get on Instagram to see what was happening in the world and I would have to go through stories, reels, and feed just to see everything. Before I knew it, I had wasted an hour on social media and didn’t even consume any decent content. It was all just a bunch of nonsense people are doing for likes and views.
Twitter noise is also just as overwhelming because it is such a fast platform that there is always something going on. You can never get enough of twitter because as soon as you refresh your feed or the trending page, there are tons of new groundbreaking issues taking place. It is all too much for me. Before, I felt connected to the world and I liked being aware of what is going on, and now since I have began a mindfulness journey, I have learned that the only thing that matter is the now. I don’t want to waste my precious time wondering what everyone else is doing.
There is too much drama on social media
If you are my age and you spend a lot of time on social media, you are probably aware that there are probably 50 ultra popular people on these platforms. These are vloggers, family vloggers, people in the beauty community and youtube stars.
Over the years, these popular kids have rose to fame as these communities became more popular. Now, every day I get online, there is so much drama. I noticed that it is pretty much from the same people non-stop. I understand that drama brings the clicks, views, and money, but I realized that this drama isn’t healthy for me. I also realized that quite frankly, it’s none of my business. Even though I didn’t normally seek out the drama from these people, it would often appear on my explore page so I would end up clicking because it was right in front of my face.
I spent a shameful amount of time being engrossed in other people’s drama. Partly because it is interesting to me that there is a whole new generation of people who essentially live their entire lives online, and partly because it’s juicy and entertaining. Either way, it’s not good for me. And it’s not good for you either.
Where do I begin with the politics…If you live here in the U.S. you know that last year (2020) was an election year. It is almost unbearable to be on social media in the U.S. during an election year. The nation is so divided. People are so hostile to one another and nobody can have a civilized conversation without becoming angry or offended.
I remember seeing so many posts about people disowning their family, friends, and other relatives because of their political beliefs. I believe that social media had a huge role in that. Seeing nothing but political posts and arguing on my feed really brought down my mood. I honestly don’t know why I didn’t remove myself from the platforms back then.
I quit social media because it became addicting
According to google, the average person spends 2 hours and 24 minutes per day on social media. I beg to differ. I think people spend way more time than that. Since apple has a handy little screen time widget, I am able to see that my screen time is normally around 8-9 hours per day.
To be fair, I do use my phone for pretty much everything. Reading on kindle, paying bills, working on my blog, and social media. Not all of my screen time is spent on social platforms. Either way, 9 hours on the phone is way too long. There is an entire world waiting for me and I was choosing to spend my time on the phone mindlessly scrolling.
I have used the phone to learn a lot. I have started new hobbies, created a business, and other wonderful things. But honestly, when it is all said and done, most of the time I spend on my phone is on social platforms. Youtube especially. Even though it is a bit different from Instagram and Twitter, it is easy to go down the video rabbit hole for an hour or two.
I realized that I was constantly checking my phone. To the point where I never had a minute of silence. I couldn’t even stand in line at the grocery store for more than 20 seconds without checking my feeds.
I think people are like this because of the fear of missing out. I remember one day I decided to take a short break from my phone. I was only away from it for about two hours when my mom called and said that Kobe Bryant, his daughter, and other people on the plane had passed away. I thought to myself ‘wow I put my phone down for two hours and this is what I miss?’
I think we all want to be in on everything. We don’t want to miss out on what’s happening in the world. But at some point it just becomes too much.
Distorted beauty standards
This subject is slightly controversial, even for me. And I want to leave a disclaimer that I fully support people wanting to look and feel their best. But recently, the beauty standards are changing in a very dark way. With the rise of photoshop and filters, more and more people are struggling with their body image. Men are included in this because there is pressure on them as well.
Women are getting multiple procedures on their face and body, only to still feel the need to use photoshop and filters. We have created a generation of female influencers who are striving for a body type that can only be achieved with major surgery. There is a lot of more body acceptance than there was ten years ago, but there is still a lot more body shaming.
It’s also important to note that these beauty standards are nothing but trends. When I was younger (in the 90’s) It was all about having big boobs and a small bum. Now every woman wants a tiny waist and a huge derrière. But what happens when this body type isn’t trending anymore?
There was a woman in the press. I won’t name her, but she had a procedure to get a bigger bum and larger breasts. It seems great, but she ended up removing her implants later because she said it was very hard for her to fit into clothes. Her clothes would need to be large enough to fit her hips, but then they wouldn’t fit her waist. She said it was too complicated.
Everything online is about people looking perfect. When in reality, it’s our flaws that make us beautiful.
Lack of privacy
A couple of years ago I made the decision not to share my children on social media anymore. I am a firm believer that children have the right to privacy and they shouldn’t be plastered online all the time. Ever since I made that choice, I have been asked why I don’t share pictures of them anymore.
We are at the point in society where it’s weird and concerning that you aren’t posting you children every time they do something. People are questioning why it’s such a big deal.
Additionally, I became addicted to sharing my life. I actually wasn’t half as bad as some people, but I always felt the need to share every song I was listening to, the food I was eating at a restaurant, what I was doing over the weekend. Everyone always knew what I was up to and I was giving away my privacy. It took me a long time to realize that I don’t need to share things all the time.
I think that comes with the territory of social media. We all want to show off what we are doing. But you know what? Most people don’t care. They are too busy trying to make their own life look perfect.
In conclusion, I quit social media and I am happier.
Yesterday I was at a French restaurant waiting for a friend who was running late. Instead of being on my phone I just sat there. I was present in the moment. Taking in the atmosphere, the French music, listening to the owner of the restaurant speak to the guests. I didn’t want to be stuck in my phone.
My screen time on my phone has decreased significantly. 40% to be exact. I am alone with my thoughts more and its lovely. I am spending more time living mindfully and caring for my soul instead of worrying about what everyone else is doing.
If you have been thinking about quitting social media, this is your sign from the universe. Delete your apps and live your life to the fullest.